If I could answer one question that would offer the biggest impact on life for divorced, single dads over 40, it would be, “why should I hire a life coach?” I have actually been asked this question numerous times by friends and family. Do you know what I tell them?
First, Let Me Tell You A Story
Once upon a time, there was an interesting young man, let’s call him Robert (interesting and young are both relative points and up for debate). Roberet lived a great life.
He was a devoted husband and father, dedicated to his work, and was one of the most positive people that you would ever meet. He was exuberant, and life was everything he could ask for. Until it wasn’t.
The day began like many others. Robert and his wife exchanged kisses and things were pretty typical that morning. However, over the course of the day, he began to feel as if something was awry.
Little did he know, the universe was planning a grand reveal that would change the course of his life forever.
That evening Robert discovered that his wife of 14 years was cheating on him with his best friend. It was a painful blow. Their marriage wasn’t perfect, and he had made his share of mistakes in the past, but did he deserve this?
Let’s examine that statement for a moment. Did he deserve this? I would argue that when we ask ourselves the question, “what did I do to deserve this,” we are shifting the blame to someone else and more importantly we are shifting all of the power to that person.
“BLAMING SOMEONE ELSE IS LIKE HANDING OVER ALL OUR POWER, SAYING ‘HERE YOU GO…YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO CONTROL MY FEELINGS, DICTATE HOW I AM, OWN MY EXPERIENCES.’ WE ARE NOT VICTIMS. WE ARE SIMPLY PEOPLE EXPERIENCING SOMETHING PAINFUL AND HARD.”Dr. Hayley Watson
Unfortunately, Robert gave up his personal power by blaming his wife for the circumstances they were in. He believed he was a victim and his life began to spiral out of control.
So, how does the story end? First, let’s go back to my original question, if I could answer one question that would offer the biggest impact on life for single dads over 40, it would be, “why should I hire a life coach?”
It is the conclusion of this story about Robert that helps us answer this question. Had it not been for the help of a life coach, Robert may have continued down the road of powerlessness blame, and continued to spiral into a further state of self-hate and destruction.
But that isn’t what happened. Robert worked with a life coach to help him move forward. They set small goals for self-improvement as well as recovery.
The life coach provided support and accountability, without him having to burden his friends and family (who were obviously too close to the situation to help objectively like a life coach could).
Why Should You Hire A Life Coach?
A life coach can help you in the deepest, darkest moments of your life. They aren’t therapists. Therapists have an important role also.
In my experience, a therapist helps you discover and understand your past, and how the implications of that past has led you to this moment. A life coach enters at that moment, supporting, helping and planning with you on how to best move forward.
A therapist helps you discover and understand your past, and how the implications of that past has led you to this moment. A life coach enters at that moment, supporting, helping and planning with you on how to best move forward. Click To Tweet
“Sometimes in life we find ourselves stuck, unsure, stressed and confused. A coach will help you navigate through all transitions, work through blocks, and get unstuck. This leads to confidence, happiness and fulfillment in your career, your relationships and your life.”Tricia Bowman – In The Groove Coaching
There are many people smarter than me than can attest to the importance of working with a life coach.
However, I can speak from first-hand experience when I say that when I needed help and support in losing 50 pounds in 3 months, I worked with a life coach. When I was stuck and didn’t know how to move forward with starting this blog, I worked with a life coach. When I went through my divorce, one of the most traumatic life changes I have ever experienced, I worked with a life coach.
Why should you hire a life coach? That’s why.
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